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After careful consideration (and the wise counsel of close friends and associates) the blog I had prepared to share with you tonight will not be posted. It seems that I still can’t talk about Adam without going into attack mode and I’m just not interested in doing that. I had set out in earnest to speak with a measure of equanimity about some of the technical details that have to do with marriage equality, my agreement with Adam, and my current situation –but it seems that there is still enough lingering hurt and anger “bring out the Marine” in me and go for blood.

So, as I have been told (to relieve oneself of resentment) I will now pray (for the thousandth time):
Dear God, for every good thing I’ve ever prayed for for myself, I now pray for for Adam Nelson to receive multiplied many times over. If only one of us can receive it, let it be him. Amen.

I really do wish the best for him.

You would have been much more entertained by the other blog post. But this one will have to do. I’m just not willing to vibrate that much negativity out into the world about a man who, no matter what he did to me, I still do love. Suffice it to say I was hurt. Suffice it to say that a huge part of my financial woes are based on the fact that I made a very foolhardy investment and I got stung. “Live and learn,” they say.

There’s another saying that fewer of you will be familiar with. The Marines will know it. I hadn’t heard it until I went to boot camp. The saying is: “pain retains.” The meaning behind it is that the more painful the lesson, the more likely you are to remember it. So in this case, I’m guessing that I will never forget the mistakes I made that led me into such a disaster.

Pain retains. Never forget that.

See y’all tomorrow. 

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